Monday 31 January 2011

Keeping out of arm's reach of any Russians..


Three hours at a Jazz concert in Paris and my fingers are itching and with my beautiful piano locked up in a storage container across the channel, I can only tap away on my black and white laptop keys and hope for the same satisfaction from finally posting my first blog entry..
Before I begin, the Carrie's amongst you will have noticed my rip off of the penultimate Sex and the City episode 'An American Girl in Paris, Part Une'. I choose Part Une as, although anything can happen over the next 5 months I spend here, I will do the utmost in my power to not get slapped by a Russian; I don't own a Carrie necklace to be losing in Christian Dior and I am absolutely certain the love of my life won't be showing up to rescue me and take me home at any point..
(Harry Styles, if you're reading this, I'm totally kidding, I ready to be whisked off whenever you are..)
I'm living and studying in Paris until the end of the year, so for the next few months this will be my outlet for the excitement; admiration; annoyance, and of course cringe, I experience in the city. Someone asked me last night at a Super Bowl party what my three favourite things are about Paris so far and I was struck by silence. The early days of this experience have been such a whirlwind and it pains me not to yet be able to pick out specific favourites. So I'm going to save that for a later post and begin by fulfilling the British stereotype I have established myself over the last few weeks with my incessant tea drinking and inability to jump on the Metro after the dreaded doors closing siren... So until the arty and creative Parisian air inevitably gets under my skin, here are my top complaints/annoyances about the city/the French:

1) There are no Salt&Vinegar crisps. Anywhere. Ever. Wahh.
2) PDA. Yes I am aware it is the most Romantic city in the world blah blahh but seriously, what is so romantic about the metro. It's disgusting, it's underground, drunk tramps leave the stench on urine all over it and yet people still feel the need to suck on each others faces whilst travelling. Call me a bitter serial loner but I do not need that in my life.
3) Every English Literature course I take is on American books/poems/plays and people assume I know them all inside out because I'm an Anglophone. Just no, Walt Whitman has nothing on Shakespeare and Wilfred Owen!
4) The French advertise learning to speak English as speaking 'Wall Street English' and use a Great Britain flag on the poster. You may laugh at my poor, attempt at your accent but we're a long way from New York!
5) The metro stop Denfert Rochereau. Too many vowels, I can't say it.
6) Every single person owns a Mac. Ok I'm just jealous.
7) CARBS...bread, pastries, crepes, waffles...get me some protein!
8) Women are meant to balance out these carbs with coffee and smoking. NOT exercise.
9) It's bloody cold.
10) I think I'm probably going to die of second hand smoke inhilation.


To add a cheery note (since this post has been open and unpublished in a lonely tab for about a week), I would now like to add a thanks you to the lovely, little lady who gave me a ring she found on Pont Neuf last week and wished me 'Bonne Chance'. I have since found somewhere to live in Paris, to which I add that being homeless in Paris is not as romantic, bohemian and Ewan McGregor-esque as it sounds. Really.

Also to get rid of the slight sadist tone I developed there, I'm going to figure out how to get some photos up to show I have actually been having an amaazinggg time!

À Bientôt.

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