Is it out of line if I were to be bold and say 'would you be mine?'..

Despite thorougly enjoying the absolutely-can't-keep-our-hands-off-each-other stage of our relationship, there is one thing for certain I have come to realise I am not going to miss about mon amour, Paris. It's one of the few cultural concepts I am yet to become acclimatized to and one that does not bode well with my already awkward personality.

Meeting, greeting and bidding farewell to the French..

Considering the Parisiens infamous rude reputation and inability to make small talk, one would think that the last thing they would be eager to do is plant their lips on the faces of complete strangers, but so it goes. I have no problem with sharing the love with mes amis in this way, after all hugging is reserved solely for lovers and two girls embracing are obviously lesbians no? But, walking into a French house party, meeting large groups of friends of friends or even before a hardcore game of Le Spin, one must circuit the entire room kissing each person on each cheek, 9 times out of 10 before even knowing the said person's name and ALWAYS right cheek to right cheek then left to left. I still wait in fear and cringe for the first time I screw that one up. I realise as vent about this that it may sound like much ado about nothing in writing but believe me, IT IS AWKWARD! 

Imagine rushing down the street on your way to University and seeing someone you know or even vaguely know through a friend, you must stop, *kisses*, then after 30 seconds of pleasantries, *kisses* once again. Not only is it awkward, it's bloody time wasting too. Or imagine completing 4 hours of sport on a Sunday morning and bidding farewell to your team mates completely covered in mud, absolutely exhausted and desperate to get into the car and head back to Paris. Surely the guys you've been playing against for the whole morning won't want to start being friendly now, but oh yes, cheek-to-cheek mud transfers all round.

But what if the Frenchie you're being introduced to is a handsome one, a perfect bonus to the kissing game, obviously not the time to become extremely aware of your breath or the smell of your hair. You would think. And if the guy you're kissing smells exceptionally great or his stubble playfully tickles your cheek as you greet, the girlish smile and subconcious swoon that follows can only make the occassion awkward all over again.

So yes Paris, I am completely infatuated with everything you do but please let's take things slower, you don't even know my name..